On April 21, 2028, Katherine Wolf suffered a massive stroke. She didn’t lose her life, but she lost her ability to walk, talk clearly, and care for herself. She went from being a California model to a wheelchair-bound patient. She’s endured eleven surgeries and daily fights to regain her strength. More than once she has felt like giving up. One of those occasions occurred the day before Thanksgiving, seven months into her ordeal. Here’s how she desribes it.
Despair washed over me as I watched Jay (her husband) and his sisters playing with James (their baby), lifting him in the air and running around with him in circles, laughing out loud, while I could barely even hold my head up because my neck wasn’t strong enough yet.
I found myself wondering, Has God made a mistake? . . . I’ve gone from making lasagna in my little kitchen to being fed all meals through a tube in my stomach . . . I’ve gone from wearing a cute outfit every day to wearing adult diapers and hospital gowns. . . . I should be in heaven right now. Then at least everyone’s pain would eventually come to an end.
Her loss could have hardly been more pronounced. From one moment to the next, her world was flipped upside down. Yet as her heart bevan to sink, God stepped in:
And then suddenly, before those thoughts had even fully landed in my head and heart, I felt a deep awakening of the Word of God, which I had known since I was a little girl. I could almost hear this rapid-fire succession of the truths of Scripture, like a dispatch from God Himself.
Katherine, you are not a mistake. I DON’T MAKE MISTAKES. I know better than you know. I’m God, and you’re not. Remember that you were fearfully and wonderfully made in your mother’s womb. . .
There is purpose in all of this.
Trust Me. I am working out EVERYTHING for your good. Don’t doubt this truth just because you are in darkness now. What’s true in the light is true in the dark.
I know you can’t fight this. That doesn’t matter. All you have to do is be still and let Me fight for you. I will complete the good work I began when I gave you new life. I will carry it on to completion. Believe that. My nature is to redeem and restore and strengthen. This terrible season will come ot an end. You will suffer for a little while, and then I will carry you out of this. I have chosen you. Live a life worthy of this special calling you have received.
Something supernatural occurred in those moments as those truths hit me hard. God met me in the midst of the messiness of my life, and I felt fresh determination to press on and persevere. I suddenly felt extraordinary-in spite of my terrible pain. That moment changed everything for me. It was my epiphany of hope. I knew deep inside that my “earth suit” was only temporary. I would never lose heart in this situation because my soul was not what was wasting away. My body didn’t work. That was all.
From: Hope Heals: A True Story of Overwhelming Loss and an Overcoming Love by Katherine and Jay Wolf.